Sunday, October 30, 2005

Sunday Short Cuts:
Kill Saddamn, Damnit; Those Damn Albertans; Liberals Can SMBFMFD; Iran Luvz Da Damjooz; And A Whole Lotta Luvvin...

Weekends are usually made for taking it easy. But as usual, the world hardly stops, and the past few weeks have been insane-crazy-fugazi for Yours Trooly.

So allow me to make some short rants...

  1. Saddam Hussein is currently in front of the judge, pleading his case and buying so much time it would make OJ Simpson look like a slacker. Too bad Johnnie Cochrane is no longer around to defend his sorry hide. Even worse, the Toronto Sun's Peter Worthington would like to see his head on a platter.
    And so he goes...

    The trial is the easiest case to prosecute -- the deliberate, calculated murder of more than 140 people in the Shia village of Dujail in 1982, in response to a botched assassination attempt against the visiting Saddam.
    The village was bulldozed into the ground, and kinfolk of those murdered imprisoned and hounded for years.
    What should happen (but won't) is that if Saddam is found guilty (almost a certainty) he should be sentenced to death and executed forthwith.
    Not a nice thing to say. But even if the court showed some mercy, there are millions of his fellow Iraqis who would like to do unto him what mercenary minutemen bandit-insurgent terrorists have been doing unto unfortunate foreign infidel-devil hostages in the past, only with duller, rustier butter knives.
    So let Amnesty International complain about this poor wretch's predicament; they should've realised that he, and nobody else, has brought this onto himself.

  2. Remember the $40,000,000 (Cdn.) Lotto 6/49 jackpot?
    Somebody won it.
    In Alberta.
    You know... Canada's richest province at the moment.
    And when those fateful numbers were drawn, because almost every human being living in the Dominion bought scores of tickets, the pot ballooned to a honkin' huge $54,294,724 (Cdn.) / $46,115,371.34 (US) / 38,265,051.85€.
    As for that "somebody", it turned out to be a lottery pool of 17 employees at a plant in Sedgewick. Each member got $3.17 million for a small quick-pick investment.
    Tax-free, by the way.
    So I'd like to congratulate these lucky prairie rats on the winfall.
    Don't spend it all in one shot, eh?

  3. God - those damn libertine Liberals that keep getting re-elected every time are getting on my nerves.
    They neglected our miltary, softened our criminal justice system to the point where prisoners live in better luxury than some of the victims (that, and the right to vote, too), spending money wherever and whenever they can not so much as to improve the quality of Canadian life but to buy more votes, supporting outright moonbatty causes, ignoring terrorist threats pre- and post-9/11...
    But the sorest of sore spots - aside from the major cock-up leading to the 1970 October Crisis, but let's not get ahead of ourselves - is still the Québec Sponsorship Scandal, a.k.a. AdScam. Prime Time Crime has a collection of timelines, facts, rants and articles of the pork-barrelling and money-laundering that was going on in the guise of promoting Canadian unity in pas exactement belle province.
    Sadly, if it weren't for the smug, ignorant, imbecilic complacency of then-Prime Minister Jean Chrétien during the 1995 Québec Referendum, we wouldn't be in such a predicament now, would we, eh? (See also the CBC rundown of the event.)
    And now the self-proclaimed saviours of Canadian unity are facing new problems that have arised from the Gomery Inquiry and the scandal that has spawned it in the form of a resurgent Québec sovreignty debate. The following editorial in the Toronto Sun puts this situation in perspective...
    ...10 years ago the "No" side defeated the "Yes" side by a margin of 50.6% to 49.4%. Meanwhile, a Strategic Counsel poll released last week showed if the same question was asked in Quebec today, 48% would vote "Yes" compared to 47% voting "No," with 5% undecided.
    So how can the Liberals possibly claim to be the only party that can keep Canada united, when it's their own actions that keep tearing us apart?
    Sadly, the Liberal legacy of being everything to everyone everytime is starting to bite the party in the collective crotch. Sadly, all the other parties in Canada might fall into the same backscratch trap were they in positions to govern. A sad state of affairs when you're in a parliamentary nation.
    And, alas, when you have a party that has influenced the country and its people for the latter part of the 20th century and the first few years of this one, people will still re-elect the Liberals mainly because although the opposition leaders have massive cases against the monolith, they are bereft of fire and inspiration. And the electorate that are weaned on the milk of Grit largesse will need more than polite rhetoric to sway their votes the other way.
    Lotsa luck in the next Federal Election.

  4. Iran... land of rugs, Sheherazade, oil and caviar.
    And mullahs by the truckload.

    And the normally classy and world-savvy Iranis know better than to let a bunch of theocratic bozos ruin their fun, especially since now their doing a little bit of experimentation on a version of the "big-bang theory" - big-news in the Conservative blogsphere, but old hat to those in the know.
    And now their fundamentalist funda-mental-case president has decided to give props to the Israelis for being... well, Israelis.
    It went like this...
    We must see what the real story of Palestine is. Is the conflict in Palestine a war between some Jews on the one side and Muslims and non-Jews on the other side? Is it a war between the Jews and other faiths? Is it the war of one country with other countries? Is it the war of one country with the Arab world? Is the conflict only over the limited lands of Palestine? I think the answer to all these questions is negative.
    The creation of the regime occupying Al-Qods (Jerusalem) was a heavy move by the globally dominant system and Global Arrogance against the Islamic world. There is a historic battle going on between the Oppressor World and the Islamic world and the roots of this conflict goes back hundreds of years.
    [...] The occupying state (Israel) is the bridgehead of the Oppressor World in the heart of the Islamic world. They have built a base to expand their domination to the entire Islamic world. There is no other raison d’etre for this entity without this objective.
    [...] Our dear Imam (the late Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini - Y2D) ordered that the occupying regime in Al-Qods be wiped off the face of the earth. This was a very wise statement. The issue of Palestine is not one on which we could make a piecemeal compromise… This would mean our defeat. Anyone who would recognize this state [Israel] has put his signature under the defeat of the Islamic world.
    In his struggle against the World Arrogance, our dear Imam targeted the central and command base of the enemy, namely the occupying regime in Al-Qods. I have no doubt that the new wave that has started in dear Palestine and which we witness today all over the Islamic world will soon wipe this scourge of shame from the Islamic world. This can be done.
    Translation: Israel=Evil; Palestine™=Good
    So all those nice little things that the Palestinian© shaheeds® are doing, such as blowing up taverns, shopping centres and dinners, will further the cause of the umma. That's nice. I'm quite sure that Michael Moore will do a movie about this "noble" cause and get another Oscar nomination for his trouble.
    Fact of the matter is, this prez doesn't like the Damjooz too much.
    Naturally, the self-proclaimed "civilized" world, including Canada, condemned this nutcase and his slander.
    Matters are made a little more difficult with a launch of yet another "I hate Israel because it's not real" site. So far, most of it is in Farsi, but despite it's political smokescreen, it's still another "I hate the Heebz jus' because" site.
    Methinks that the Mossad has another job to do, just because the Yanks are too damn busy trying to negotiate.

  5. Dream Death Matches...
    Killers vs. Franz Ferdinand vs. Hot Hot Heat (any of these groups can save rock 'n roll, but which one of them will live to be on the cover of Tiger Beat?)
    Hillary Duff vs. Lindsay Lohan (special hot oil match - with real hot petroleum!)
    Coheed & Cambria vs. Rush (no contest - Neil Peart can handle these noisy Joisey wannabes)
    The Veronicas vs. Tegan and Sarah vs. Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen (my money's on T 'n S 'cause they're Canadians, but the Vs have the slickness)
    The New York Dolls vs. Good Charlotte (there can be only one Dolls!)
    Jason Statham vs. Tom Cruise (Jason is the new King of Kool, maan)
    Michael Moore vs. Jabba the Hutt (nobody steals Jabba's shit and lives, dude)
    Slipknot vs. Coq Roq (although the Roq's lyrics sound real - uh, Kawwk Rawwk, eh?)

  6. File under "criminally ignored by the mainstream".
    If you don't have a true copy of "Robot Hive / Exodus" by Maryland rawwkerz Clutch, you should feel ashamed of yourself.
    Mainly because you're denying yourself a taste of some of the finest hard rawwk this side of Deep Purple.
    From the opening track, "The Incomparable Mr. Flannery" to the blues covers that close out the collection, Neil Fallon and the boyz burn the house down, roof and all.
    And with the addition of a keyboardist in the lineup, Clutch's sound has gotten itself a meaty sound that will stick with you for a long time. It's leadoff "single", "Burning Beard", will not get out of your head. Neither will Neil's voice.
    So what are you waiting for? Buy the damn disk.

  7. The Superjesus... MIA?
    One of my favourite "underrated and mainstream-ignored" bands from Australia has vanished into thin air.
    Their last known address in cy-space was
    So can anyone tell me what happened? Much appreciated, eh?

Well... that's it. I'm off to bed.

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