Monday, November 22, 2004

Who the hell is Sean Hannity? (And why does he deserve to be hated?)

Courtesy of, columnist Chris Davis explores the deep, dark side of one of Amurrica's controversial conservative commentator.

Joe Scarborough, a former Republican congressman from Florida who now hosts MSNBC’s “Scarborough Country,” says the challenge for conservative hosts will be to prove “that we’re more than just the Pravda of the right.” He adds, “I think that’s going to be difficult for some people. I honestly don’t know what Sean Hannity is going to be able to talk about. If you’ve been reading off the Republican National Committee’s talking points like he has for the past four years, it’s going to be hard to be critical of the status quo.” Amen, brother Scarborough. It’s about time someone stood up to this fascist radio host.

I'm already beginning to hate this Sean Hannity guy. And I never even heard him speak.

It appears that this fascist, jackboot-licking, running-dog lackey of U.S. imperial interests is in league with like-minded automatons like the blonde Aryan wench-dominatrix Ann Coulter, inbred oxyxontin junkie Rush Limbaugh and the self-whoring disgrace to the brown-skin race Michelle Malkin. They all want to turn this progressive, peace-love-flower loving nation of placid drones into one big capitalist, imperialist Treblinka state, complete with colour-coded warnings of imaginary threats based on hearsay and rumours. Some people believe that it's on its way, while others believe that it may already be here, only that this socio-political Apocalyse isn't yet noticeable on the surface, eh?

And it's the existence of those genocidal fuckers that makes me grateful for being the citezen of the most enlightened, sacred, progressively Liberal welfare nanny-state of Canada.

A place where 50% of my pay goes to the government to fund programs that most people are too ignorant to be aware of, but I'm sure as hell that they're programs that are needed.

A place where if you intentionally kill someone, you might only have to spend less than 25 years of you life behind bars, enjoying sattelite t.v., 3 square meals a day, a chance at a secondary or post-secondary education and a faint hope of an early release for good behaviour.

A place where if you're a child molester, you can be anonymously placed back into the community after serving hard time.

A place where we don't really need an armed force to protect our sovreignty: just true patriot tender loving care.

And most of all, a place where one can get the World's Bestest Health Care!

But back to the subject at hand, eh?

Mr. Davis proudly espouses things that his beloved Democratic Party belive in, things that we Progressive Canadians take (or want to take) for granted...

(W)e are the party of inclusion. We are the party of compassion, not George W. Bush, a man that titles himself a “compassionate conservative.” We are the party that classifies all people into groups. We’re the people that understand minorities need a helping hand, knowing they couldn’t possibly make it in America on their own. We’re the kind of Americans that believe women have been exploited, and that women like Laura Schlessinger are disgusting for telling them to stay home and raise children. How dare she insult the women of America? How dare she claim they bond with their children, and become a wonderful mother, wife, and lover?

... We must label men like Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh as ignorant bigots, because they represent the majority belief in America. We know they threaten our socialistic way of life, our blue states, and our united goal in one, powerful controlling and meddling federal government. We must cast aspersions at women like Ann Coulter, labeling them as angry white women, knowing we have become the party of hate, lies and deception. We are represented by Teresa Heinz Kerry, Barbara Streisand, Whoopi Goldberg, and Howard Dean.

And it all goes on!

I say "Yay!" to Big Liberalism and a Progressive Future!

I say "Yay!" to State Mollycoddling and Intervention on matters such as sushi and those pesky English words on signs in the Enlightened Belle Province du Québec!

And I say "Yay!" to our brave former Prime Minister Jean Chretien, who stood up against that Hitlerite death-camp mongerer George W. Bitch when he waged war against poor, innocent, progressive and freedom-loving leader of the mainly grateful Iraqi children, Saddam Hussein.

Boo on you, USA. Yankee go home. Vive la Liberté. VIVE LA FRANCE!

And boo on you, Hannity!


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